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It’s not Rocket Science

It’s not Rocket Science
 

It’s not Rocket Science!  Pouring more money into a system like this won’t help much, unless the Battered Women themselves are leading the way.  Any Politician worth his salt should be able to figure it out … Take some of those billions of dollars that we’re wasting on personal agendas and ridiculous wars, and take up the cause of abused women and their children.  You’ll get a helluva lot more votes!  I guess it’s time to focus on her abuser now.  We’d better, he’s still there!  He still has an existence and he’s just waiting.  He knows his time will come.

 

I wonder about him and his life, and has he made good use of his time in prison?  When that day comes and he gets out, will his attitude be better or will he have wasted his time and become sicker in the head?  And once that choice is given to him, what will he do?  Will he try to do something productive with his life or will he be consumed with taking his frustrations out on her, and make her just another statistic ... Dead?  And if he decides to come back and pay her back for a wrong he feels done, who’s going to have a camera on him wherever he goes?  Will the next time I see her be at her funeral, as I view her in her casket … Right before she’s lowered into the ground?  I pray to God that’s not so.  Maybe I’m dreaming, but can’t help it ... I hope for the best.  I see a much better option for him than retaliation. 

 

Although it will take a lot of determination on his part, he will now have the chance to show us his best.  He will now have the opportunity to do something very constructive with his life.  What will he do with this chance of a lifetime?  Will he amount to something or will he just blow it again and kill her, then another ... Then another?  Will he try to control her life again or has he matured enough to take control of his own? 

 

If anyone lives in fear, it should be him!  Heather shouldn’t have to hide … She’s done nothing wrong.  Your guess is as good as mine as to where it all could end. 

 

As I’m sure you can tell by now, I’ve felt somewhat guilty over the years.  I was a part of the system that was supposed to protect her.  Heather was right there when I needed her and the only time that she called for me … I was nowhere around.  Yes, I’ve got a conscience!  Does he?  Do you?   Does our system? 

 

This story was mostly written before I ever laid eyes on her again, and it was only a month or so beforehand that I had even spoken to her on the phone.  I guess things like this have a purpose, because here I am at last, writing this story about her. 

 

I’d like to leave a message for Heather’s abusive ex-husband, Thomas Price, Jr....As he sits in prison until April 24, 2009 at the Bennettsville, South Carolina Federal Correctional Institution…

 

“It wasn’t Heather!  It’s the bad choices you’ve made that prompted me to write this chronicle.  Had it not been for your abusive actions, this wouldn’t be much of a story.  But don’t expect royalties here for mistakes that you’ve made.

 

Soon, you’ll be out again and we’re all wondering…What will you do?  Surely, you’re more educated now, but at the moment, even you may not have a clue.  But this is my promise to you…

 

Someday, I may offer my hand to you in friendship once you’ve proved honorable intentions.  But if you decide to try manipulating Heather or your children, or harming her, them or anyone else in any way…Now, everyone who reads this story will know about you.  At the least, I’m going to do my damnedest to make sure that’s quite a few.

 

There are many like me who love women out here.  Also, there are many in there with you.  Will you join us, or will we chase you…It’s your choice. It’s all up to you.”

 

And for the government systems that were set up to help and protect her, I also have a few words...

 

“You’re just as I was, years ago with my children.  You need help now!  You need a Babysitter … A good one!  I did it before and I can do it again.  I’m going to keep searching until I find one I can trust to look after you and the ones that I love … Like that little mother hen who watched over our sons!” 

 

It’s just a matter of time.

 

Having been in law enforcement for so long, I tend to be skeptical.  I tend not to go with all of the bullshit that I read, hear or even see ... But more from my own personal experiences, and even more importantly than that … From what my gut tells me!  Based upon that, these are the conclusions I’ve drawn.  Both Tommy and the system have become smarter and better … At covering up. 

 

Education, we need more of it … From the top down and not from the bottom up.  Those who represent us in government first, then Judges, then Lawyers, then Law Enforcement, and right on down the line.  It’s like a rope.  It’s got to come down … We damn sure can’t push it up!  Our best training will not come from Politicians, College Professors or Administrators.  Our greatest learning will come from those in the trenches, the experts who’ve been there … The Survivors.  But we’d better start now, because we can’t expect that these few Survivors who do speak out will live but so long. 

 

There are many questions left unanswered…

What will we do about the protection and care of all of our children? 

Will Heather and the multitude of others like her, ever be able to live normal lives without having to fight every step of the way?

Are we willing to take the necessary steps to help them get beyond just surviving … to thriving? 

As a result of our ignoring their basic needs for survival, will women eventually lose their nature of compassion and nurturing? 

Isn’t the core of our society worth a little more effort and a few more dollars? 

Is her abuser better now and if so, how will he prove it? 

What will he do to restore our trust? 

How can we help him to help us? 

What if he’s worse? 

Will we ignore all the others like him? 

How many like him are actually in prison?

Which is closer to the root of the problem … sex offenders or abusers? 

Will there ever be a way to track them? (Efforts are showing with sex-offenders … But what about abusers?) 

And what’s all this crap about “Family Values” and other sound-bites like that? (Because so little actions are taken, these well-placed words for the media have now lost their meaning)

And if we’re really so concerned about “Human Rights,” why has a female’s right to leave, live and continue to exist been so largely ignored. 

 

Hey!  It’s an Emergency!  Help me out here!  I can’t handle all of this by myself.  I’m just an ole man on the porch. 

 

For those of us males who love women and making love with them, we’d better turn the sound back on and get off of our asses.  We’ve got to help and protect them … If we do, in fact, love them. 

 

What’s your relationship like?  Is it about love and caring or is about power and control?  Pay attention to your gut!  If you’re a female and you just feel, that it’s the latter and you want to be a Survivor, don’t think twice … You’d better get the hell out of there!  If you’re a male and it’s the latter, the same may also be true … Because if you’re an abuser, we’ll soon be coming after you! 

 

That message on the card that Tommy sent to his child was revealing.  But who was his note meant for?  Was it for his child or his ex-wife again, or was it for all of us?  I’m going for the largest picture.  When I visualize that little clock with the message that he scrawled … I take it as a wake-up call.  We’d better hit the floor and start running!

 

It’s just a matter of …

 

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Heather's Story - One of the many stories from his book Ole Man on the Porch

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